October 2011
1 post
2 tags
"Crazy people make better bloggers"
This photo ended up on my other blog’s dashboard today. I just couldn’t help but to think it’s kind of true, you know, for myself at least. I’m not saying I’m a good blogger, I’m saying I’m completely insane and my followers appreciate that. Some may not and they can suck my dick. Or not. Because my dick is too good for them. But you would have it worse...
June 2011
1 post
32456ythvdsf36t5
I’m loving Mary Jane. Flying with Lois Lane on board a bullet train. Don’t know yet if I’m glad I came.
Obviously this helps me… I think??
I’m stuck between a hard place and the biggest rock, in my own head consumed. I sit back in my room. It’s like the tapestries of life get tangled in the loom. I’m like a butterfly, caught in a hurricane. My pulse is...
April 2011
1 post
2 tags
...
I don’t know what but I see this more to this. It’s not just something in the air. I’ll come running to help you out when your hour of darkness comes. Remember there’s a strength inside of us.
Are we more than human? Will we be more than a memory? Just fragments of a distant stop. Am I more than human? And one day I’ll fly away. Maybe I’ll go back to where I...
February 2011
6 posts
After experiencing and witnessing too many losts, I’ve come to realize there’s no place for love in my life. It’s gotten to a point I can’t bear anymore. These eyes have seen more deaths than you could ever imagine. Shutting my eyes doesn’t make things disappear, but if you’re sick enough of reality, it does a hell of a lot for wishful thinking but since when...
1 tag
Probably the last thing I’ll ever post.
I want a box around myself, so they can put me on the shelf to see the way I live. But the holes are blocked by everybody else inside. As far as I can tell, they’re all living well, living better, still that’s the way it is. Climbing up the corporate ladder, trying to escape through the roof.
Have you ever felt the pinch when your life’s confined? Well, get your ass in line....
I poured out my heart today and talked with your absence like a prisoner, like a wreck, like only myself. I flowed my insides out today. I talked with my inner self. Just like a kid who sees his face for the very first time, I saw my inner face. I saw myself. The mirror broke into eternity. I hushed myself. I’m angry at myself.
1 tag
You had no idea.
“Are you AWOL? Did you run from the war?“ “I need a place to rest.“ “You’re a soldier. You fight.“ “Not anymore. When everything ends, I want to be here with you. Please.“ “I don’t want everything to end. Not again.”
You put your gun to my head when I had opened my arms wide to hold you and take you away with me. But of course darling, you had no idea that once you’re dead, you can not die...
1 tag
Maybe I'm incredibly high but nothing makes sense...
January 2011
20 posts
1 tag
I’ll classify every word out of your lips as a lie until you’re lying beneath the dirt and the soil, hailed as the queen of deceivers and cheats. I hope your breathing doesn’t come easy. I pray to God I’m all you dream. I hope you feel my touch, hear my voice, taste my lips with every sip of noise. Save your tears. Don’t apologize. All you’ll hear is...
I just need to get (this) out.
I don’t need the snapped rope or the healed scars on my throat to know how lucky I am. All my hits come from my misses and it feels no longer write/right on target, how life is not sleeping all day and fighting all night, myself vs. my emotions, and I am more than the rambling, erased phone messages from my exes, and the burden to myself. I was still the best secret you (n)ever had....
3 tags
My heart is taking over. It is taking over. It is...
I threw up twice today, the first time envy poured from my stomach with blood.The second lust, causing me to choke until god decided to make me suffer and give me that breath of air. The last five are caged under my ribs, trying to burn their way out with acid and the smell of formaldehyde is clogging up my lungs like you are clogging up my head. I love you and I hate you and I want your smokey...
1 tag
iveneverbeensoenvious
When you’re burning to death, your body automatically curls you into the fetal position, shuts down and you pass out before you feel too much pain. It just gives in, gives out, gives up. You dream in blue and I dream in gold and they mesh to make this murky grey we can’t see anything through this city’s smog that’s brought the fall of our empire before it even rose. Talk...
When you have all the powers and can't be killed...
And when I wake up I realize that everything’s still wrong. I’m still here and you’re still gone. It’s not fair. Cause either way I spin it separation seems so wrong. These breaks are far too long for me. Hours and hours I’m stuck inside this place and this town and you’re gone. Far away, you’re fighting for your life all alone. I want to wake up and go...
This tortures me so much that I get sick and throw...
I know it's been a while but I swear you wouldn't...
2 tags
So far I wrote 425 fucking pages about you! That...
I am hacking my lungs out in a room that smells like murder and clove cigarettes and my bedtime story is narrorated by Alex’s nearly lost voice as he reads the obituaries from the local paper. And I really cannot help but think about if maybe we’d passed these people on the street sometime before they died yesterday and when Alex stops to clear the phlegm out of his throat I think what...
I am usually so right about these things and this...
The night was new and you were the only one I could see in the (honey)moonlight. I was making rythyms out of breaths and a bassline from your heartbeat. One finger down for the soft warm noises you make in your sleep and I felt like I was counting down till the morning. I was ashes to ashes and dust to dust by the time the sky breaks through the black but your imprint on the pillow is still making...
Camisado combustion.
The blood on your bed… Well, consider it a gift from me to you. It’s from the heart, like your fist to my lip is from yours, if your heart exists anymore. Has it disintegrated with burning through your ears? Or is it burning your flesh like this scent of dead skin on a linoleum floor the scent of quarantine wings in a hospital? No. -It’s not so pleasant;;; -It’s not so...
I've only seen you once, only in my mind. No...
These baby blues are drowning amongst the salt of my sorrow. These baby blues were made for you. And you for them… Don’t be afraid of what you know you want. Spit out the bitter so I’ll sing until this dream loses grip. Until my faith is dashed to bits. How far will I have to fall before you realize you have fallen for me too? I’ll spill my heart through this pen....
You'd run away and come with me to destroy the...
If you could see me here this way, looking backwards from today, would you do it all again? If I could roll it back to you, just like lovers always do… I’m stoned in love, but not with you. If we could wash the past away, would we go our separate ways or do it all again? As if I care… Is this the way it’s meant to be? You’re stoned in love, but not with me. Good luck....
Esotericism
If only our lives were merely nothing more that what our imaginations chose to make them, to turn them into… But, we are figments of our own conception. Together coexisting in cooperation with another to effectuate our aspirations. Existence is life. existence is comprised by choices, comprised by our chorus. You are your own diety. You’d truth upon this conspiracy.
Over years I...
If you can not see it you are blind.
Why do you sing to everybody but me? Why do I let it go on? You know that you’ve got such a rock song in my head all day?!! Baleful girl with wild eyes, dressed in satin and lace…But she is just an end digging dime tonight with a moon across her face. You are the day dream in my eyes there whenever I wake up but the call has never crystallized and I never get enough. Why do you...
Why must I stay here when my friends have left and...
Bad timing. Always.
Every night will go by too slow without you laying next tome. I’ll find myself snuggling way too close to the wall, just so I can pretend that you are spooning behind me. I’ll miss your sleepy noises And I’ll miss waking up with you asleep beside me and rolling over and kissing you while you sleep. And having you wake up just enough to kiss me back. I’ll also miss...
I don't understand why anyone would fall for me...